While the PUB has many happy hours, we understand that you, dear reader, have only a few minutes to spare. So here are short, snappy, 100-word speeches from the members of this alliance…

Ramesh Srivats – Let’s Put Da for ‘Best New Indiblog’ and Twitter Feed (here or here) for ‘Best IndiMicroblog

High folks, Ice stand before your ice in order to wine for your votes. Let me be gin by explaining to you that it is only beer pressure that is making me solicit so shamelessly. But if we win we promise you many sops (and hops). We promise not justice but soda and water too. Not mere roads but high ways. So give us your cheers and give the others booze. We guarantee full freedom. You can be physically loose as long as you are mentally tight. And one last pint – Vote not just once, but bar bar.

Krish Ashok – Doing Jalsa and Showing Jilpa for ‘Most Humorous Indiblog’. He Twitters here.

Four score and 10 years ago, this country made a pledge – to stop using obscure terms like “score” and use normal language instead. To boldy go where no enterprises have gone before. To be on the side of the inconvenient truth so that our hearts warm to the glow of the heating earth. So that the force is with us, the mass of a billion people accelerating towards global domination. Our wings are on fire and we’d like to spend more than one night at the call centre. To achieve these dreams requires a blog-ical coalition, a coalition of the shilling, a coalition that makes a killing, a coalition of laughs action heroes who uplift the masses against the cruel burden of gravitas and lift them to rofland. Vote for us people. We will sing lol-labies for you for the rest of your online life.

Lucky Bhat – Bhatnaturally for ‘Best Business Indiblog’. He Twitters here.

Kya aap advertising khabron se pareshan hai? TV campaign, crowdsourcing, social media, jaise kayi campaigns se information overload ki bimari hai?. Haan bhai haan? Bas subah sham lijiye do spoon Bhatnaturally.  Aur aapki chinta gaayab. Poye Pocchu! Chole gaye che. Jee haan, Advertising, Apple aur New Media khabron aur vicharon ka lajawab mishran, Bhatnaturally. Advertising jadibootiyon se bana sampoorn swadeshi, Bhatto-Bhat-naturally. Utterly Bhatturly, Bhatnaturally. Jaldi kijiye, aaj hee apna vote daliye.
Mututalfundsaresubjecttomarketrisksreadtheofferdocumentcalrefullybeforeinvesting.

…and the alliance gets stronger…

Maxdavinci – Dappan Koothu for ‘Best Entertainment Indiblog’ and ‘Best Personal Indiblog’. He Twitters here.

Years ago the Incas and Aztecs prophesied many things like wads of cash being dumped in the hose of commons, A singer doing an item song and later getting his ass kicked by an ichadari nag, and a nasal crooner performing to a packed house at the wembley when even dual oscar winners fail to. We all knew that didn’t we, but then their greatest prophecy was lost forever as the scroll was drowned in a gigantic vat of sambar. The scroll however now recovered prophesizes the formation of a motley crew of bloggers who will change the face of the blogiverse. Vote PUB to power and the ministry of entertainment will ensure the deluge of beef avail that is dished out in the name of cinema these days. More reviews, more gore and of course we shall get rid of poverty and world peace. Spread world peace i.e by not bombing countries but planets and moons!
PS: Don’t tell me that you believe the greatest recipe in the world was invented by some maami from mambalam. The kannadigas failed to recreate the recipe and then made up for it by adding some nuts and gave it a different name.

Rakesh Jhunjhunwala (or a much funnier imitation) – The Secret Journal of Rakesh Jhunjhunwala for ‘Most Humorous Indiblog’ and ‘Best Personal Indiblog’. He Twitters here.

Dear people who put things on Ramesh’s blog. Ramesh & I have a lot of things in common. We are both sexy individuals.
Being the World’s 1062nd richest man I could rig the election but I will do nothing. You may accuse me of tampering with the EVM’s and bribing the electoral officers. You may file a case in the High Court and appeal in the Supreme Court and have the CBI investigate the matter.
In the middle Mosques might break and riots might happen. Brothers will fight for gas but Deve Gowda will always be greater than Barack Obama.
What were we talking about again?

So, dear reader, play your part for a brighter tomorrow. Make up for not voting in the Lok Sabha Elections. Basically vote for a different set of jokers.

The PUB is open to all. Just send a mail to letsDOTputDOTdaATgmailDOTcom. With a 100-word speech. This post will get updated as and when.

If you want to read more 100-word speeches of less significant people, you can go here, here, here, or even here.

We wanted to start an RSS feed, but the BJP objected.

Indibloggies, as you all know, is a highly prestigious award, which, after recent developments, has overtaken even the Nobel Peace Prize, in terms of credibility & importance.

Like its cheap imitations (Grammys, Oscars, etc.), Indibloggies too has various categories in which awards are given out. There are some technical awards like Best Blog & Most Humorous Blog which one needs to sit through. But by far, the most important categories are of course – “Best New Indiblog” and “Best IndiMicroblog”.

This blog has been shortlisted for “Best New Indiblog”. New??? Well it was quite new when nominations were called for. Since then, we have aged gracefully, but I would like to believe that Let’s Put Da still retains a lot of its childish immaturity.

Now all you need to do is write a program that keeps hitting the site and voting for ‘Let’s Put Da” – a cyber version of booth capturing. If your ethical code prevents you from doing this, you can do it the hard way – by visiting the site and voting. I’m not sure if a person can vote multiple times, but if not, you can always log in with various aliases (a list of names you could use is provided here).

So please go forth & vote and help Let’s Put Da join the ranks of Shiney Ahuja, Tushar Kapoor & Bobby Deol.

Incidentally, my twitter updates which be found here, or here, have been shortlisted for “Best IndiMicroblog”. So while you are at it, you might as well vote for me there too.

For the record, the person I admire most is Mother Teresa, and if I win I will work for world peace.

Here is the link to the polls – Indibloggies.

PS : Here are a few slogans that you can use to spread the word…

I’ll kick you with my foot da,
If you don’t vote for Let’s Put Da.

What is idli without vada,
What is bloggies without Let’s Put Da

Other blogs ko quote karo
Par Let’s Put Da ko vote karo.

I place my hand on the Gita and swear…Damn! Gita has a problem with this too. Let’s just leave her out of this.

I solemnly swear that I will stop mucking around with WordPress, CSS, PHP, plugins & themes; stop ducking around with the excuse of being too busy at work & play; and resume er… lucking around with politicians, media-people, and all the other clowns who inhabit our country.

In other words, back to active blogging.

The bar-hopping was fun incidentally, and I’m amazed at the variety of options that this WordPress joint has. I went through thousands of themes before arriving at this one, so I hope you like it. If you don’t, just hold your nose and take a few gulps. It’s an acquired taste. But it took me a month or so to like it, so keep at it, dear reader.

Meanwhile, Manmohan resumed his dithering, his ministers are blithering, Advani continued his withering and Muthalik, I hear, is slithering back. So there’s lots more to put, and put we shall.

Cheers

Short Puts – the collection of my twitter updates can now be found here.

We’ve been ‘putting’ for some time at the Blogger Bar. The ambience is familiar, the waiters are our friends and the management has been tolerant.

But the time has come to hop. To check out another bar. The one called WordPress. I’ve heard they have better decor and a much better variety of drinks. All at the same reasonable rate (zero) as Blogger.

So let’s settle the bill here and stagger on to the next bar. It might take a couple of days to get there. I’ll probably stumble on the way. We might lose each other. But, what the heck. I’m sure we’ll all get there somehow.

I’m writing this post so that if you lose me during this hop, you know where to find me. But then again, if I screw things up, this post too will disappear. Aaaargh. Life is complex. I need a drink.

OK. Let’s go. See you there.

Ramesh

We’ve been Putting for some time now. And it has been most enjoyable (at least, hic, for me). Anything to do with spirits & conversation usually is. But writing a blogpost means that I have to hunt high & low and unhealthily scrape the bottom of various barrels to string together a collection of PJs. My fingernails then take some time to grow (before I can start scraping again, I mean).

Enter Twitter. Where a PJ can be sent in solitary splendour, and that too instantaneously, before inconvenient things like scruples & judgment come in the way. But then, a problem with Twitter is the lack of interaction. I send my Tweet, and then can only imagine, the groans of unsuspecting readers. In the past, I’ve posted what in my opinion, are the best of my Tweets. But what about the rest? Don’t they deserve to be condemned, castigated & censured too? If you can’t prick them, how will they bleed?

Which is why I’ve now started a new blog (or technically speaking – a microblog) which I can update many times a day by simply posting my twitter updates. So if this blog attempts to replicate a reasonably long drink, that one is more a series of shots. Hence the name – Short Puts. (Suggested by advertise_meant)

Do check it out at http://www.rameshsrivats.net/shortputs. And the more comments you leave, the more chance it has, of becoming some sort of wikipedia of PJs. And btw, my fingernails have grown quite a bit since the last post in this blog. So I shall be putting a new one soon. Cheers.

Ramesh

An insomniac from Oracle in California just visited my site. And my sitemeter visitor count crossed 10,000 (yeah, yeah, I do get kicks out of stuff like this). Of course, about 2000 of these visits were those that I had made (to check the count). Nevertheless, now that some of you have been lulled into visiting this blog regularly, let me cunningly slip-in a quick cross-promotion for my twitter updates.

I joined twitter a week back and I’m absolutely hooked on to it. All random thoughts can be instantly SMSed to Twitterland and they join an incredibly rich pool of information, entertainment and nonsense. All in a snack-sized length of less than 140 characters. Here are some of my Tweets of last week…

Bakri Id is a week away but the slaughter of (scape)goats has begun.

Chidambaram as home minister. Now I am hoping for a home-loan waiver.

Vilas Rao Deshmukh says that Ram Gopal Verma is not a terrorist. He obviously hasn’t seen RGV Ki Aag.

R.R. Patil said it wasn’t a complete intelligence failure. He was wrong. It was. In his head.

Apparently the dead terrorists were turned away from paradise. Jihad and all that is fine but they shouldn’t have shaved their beards.

Manmohan Singh visited my area yesterday, so all roads were widened and surfaced. Let’s have 25 PMs who criss-cross India non-stop.

All politicians in India will finally come together because they have found a common enemy – the public.

The only reason Barkha still has her job is the fact that her name is an anagram of Khabar.

Ramadoss to ban terrorism in public places.

You can follow my twitter updates by clicking here. And if you are extremely masochistic, you can opt to get the updates as SMSes. I, in turn, solemnly swear, that I will not inflict on you any of the “Ramesh is hungry” or “Ramesh is getting into a plane” kind of titbits that pass off as facebook status updates.

Ramesh

PS : For a hilarious look at facebook status updates, check out face value.